(Seriously, how did any of us survive the ’80s and ’90s?)
1. Lawn Darts (aka: Weapons of Backyard Destruction)
Ah, lawn darts—because nothing says “family fun” like chucking heavy metal spikes across the yard while your cousin sprints for cover. These oversized darts were banned in the U.S. in 1988 after causing literal impalements. But hey, we had great aim… eventually.
On a serious note, three children — ages 4, 7, and 13 — are known to have died in lawn dart-related incidents which is nothing but a tragedy.
2. Creepy Crawlers That Came With a Plug-In Oven
Let’s give kids molten plastic and a hot metal plate—what could possibly go wrong?
The original Creepy Crawlers “Thingmaker” from the ‘60s and its revivals in the ’90s were basically an open invitation to burn your fingerprints off. OSHA is weeping.
3. The Easy-Bake Oven (aka: Miniature Incinerator)
Speaking of toasty disasters, the Easy-Bake Oven was every kid’s dream—and every parent’s lawsuit waiting to happen.
A recall was issued in 2007 after reports of kids getting fingers stuck and suffering 2nd- and 3rd-degree burns. Maybe let’s leave baking to actual ovens?
4. Sky Dancers That Punched You in the Face
They looked magical. Felt like a sucker punch from Tinkerbell. These fairy-like toys launched into the air with grace, only to descend with the fury of a plastic ninja star.
They were recalled after causing eye injuries, facial lacerations, and at least one broken rib. Yes, a rib.
5. The CSI Fingerprint Kit That Contained ASBESTOS
Because nothing says fun like playing detective… and potentially developing mesothelioma.
This 2007 kit was pulled after it was found to contain asbestos in the fingerprinting powder. Childhood is all fun and games until you’re breathing in carcinogens.
Read more here: Asbestos in Toys (2007)
6. The SnackTime Cabbage Patch Doll That Tried to Eat You
These dolls didn’t just eat plastic snacks—they kept going. Their motorized jaws had no off switch, meaning anything that entered their mouth (like small fingers or hair) was fair game.
Multiple kids had their hair yanked out. Mattel said “oops” and yanked the dolls instead.
7. Clackers – Because Why Not Smash Glass Balls Together at High Speeds?
Two acrylic balls on a string you’d swing together until they clacked. Sounds innocent, right? Except when the balls shattered like tiny grenades, launching plastic shrapnel into your face. It was like dodgeball with built-in eye trauma.
I’m going to show my age here! I remember this craze sweeping through the school playground like it was yesterday! I think I got lucky though!
8. Moon Shoes (aka: DIY Ankle Destruction Devices)
Marketed as “mini-trampolines for your feet,” these plastic monstrosities promised bouncing fun. In reality, they turned sidewalks into obstacle courses of twisted ankles, faceplants, and dental bills.
Gen Z, you’ll never understand the thrill.
9. Water Wiggle – The Hose-Powered Demon Snake
This toy was supposed to dance around spastically when hooked to a garden hose. What it actually did was whip around like a possessed fire hose, with enough force to knock toddlers down.
Tragically, at least one child died after the nozzle got stuck in their mouth.
10. BB Guns for Kids, Because America
We’re still not over the fact that children—literal children—were gifted firearms that fired tiny metal balls at high velocity.
Sure, “you’ll shoot your eye out” became a pop culture joke thanks to A Christmas Story, but the real injuries were very real.
11. The Atomic Energy Lab… With Actual Uranium
Yes, this was a real thing. Released in the 1950s, the Gilbert U-238 Atomic Energy Lab came with actual samples of uranium ore. Because nothing says “fun and educational” like radiation exposure.
Okay, okay, I know we’re going back a bit, but I just could not mention this one! Crazy!
12. Slip ‘N Slides – Still Technically Legal, Somehow
While not officially banned, Slip ‘N Slides have been the cause of countless ER visits. Broken noses, chipped teeth, spinal injuries—it’s all fun and games until an adult tries it.
(Spoiler: They were never meant for adult-sized bodies.)
Still Not Convinced We Played With Borderline Death Traps?
Check out this video rounding up the 20 most dangerous kids’ toys ever sold — some of these make our list look tame. Nostalgia meets “how did we survive?” energy.
We Grew Up in a War Zone—And Loved Every Second
Let’s be real—our childhood toys were absolute chaos. Explosive, sharp, toxic, and sometimes borderline homicidal. And yet… we made it out alive (mostly). But if these toys hit shelves today, the lawsuits would rain down faster than a Sky Dancer gone rogue.
If You Made It This Far, You’ll Definitely Have Opinions on These
- 21 Things That Made Summers In The ‘80s & ‘90s Absolutely Iconic
- 17 Snacks From Our Childhood That Today’s Kids Wouldn’t Touch With a 10-Foot Pole
- 20 School Supplies That Made You Instantly Cool (Even If You Were a Nerd)
Did we miss one that definitely should’ve been banned? Drop it in the comments—unless it tried to ban you first.